No Loitering

As a mother of 3 small children, I feel like I am constantly asking someone to, "Come on!" or "Hurry up!" or "Let's go...NOW!"  Somehow my young daughters don't seem to understand my urgency to get out the door, to get in and out of the car, to get our errands run, to get things done period.  They have no concept of time.  They have no worries, no real responsibilites.  They don't wake up to an alarm clock.  Their days are filled with fun and play, as they should be.  Except when I, their very busy, task-driven, time-oriented, no dilly-dally mother, need to get something done and have to take them along with me.  Then, their world collides with mine.  Usually, the result is more chaos than I would like, but we are all learning to work together to accomplish our tasks effeciently while remaining cool, calm, and collected.  If you have figured out the magic formual for getting your children to move quickly, put their shoes on the FIRST time asked, pick up their toys without whining and falling to the floor in a heap as if you wanted them to eat cow brains, or get out of the bathtub without splashing water all over the floor and leaving their towels in the middle of the hallway, or go to the bathroom BEFORE getting them buckled in their carseat, please let me know...

I wonder if God feels the same way as our Heavenly Father.
Does He ever get tired of telling us to "Come on!" or does He ever want to bang His head against the wall as He urges us to "Hurry up!" yet one more time?  Does He wonder if we are even listening as He begs us, "Let's go....NOW!"

Today, as I was reading in Jennie Allen's book Restless, her words struck me profoundly.  She might as well have posted this sign:

Instead, she chose her words more carefully, but is still just as urgent in her message:

"So every moment we are together we make the most of it.

Every one of has people in our lives whom we need and people who need us.  Are we INTENTIONALLY spending our time in those two categories? Or are we casually bumping into each other with no real purpose to receive or give love?"

She doesn't mince words.  She doesn't beat about the bush.  She is serious.  Becuase this is a serious issue.  People's lives are on the line.

Allen goes on, "If we are honest, it is costly to love people.  So you know what we do instead of the difficult work of loving them?  We PIDDLE.  We WASTE the precious time we have."

As I read the definition of PIDDLE (in case we weren't sure what exactly it means or implies) - to WASTE TIME or spend one's time idly or INEFFICIENTLY - I realized no one has to teach us to act this way.  My 3 young girls are a perfect example of how we seem to naturally EXCEL at piddling.  From birth, we are masters at dilly dallying.  We instinctively know how to waste time, to delay what needs to be done, to put off until tomorrow what can be done today, to get distracted by other more fun things instead of focusing on what really needs to be done, to loiter, to PIDDLE.

Allen explains why we are prone to piddle, "It is easier to survive this life on the surface, brushing up against people gently, rather than doing the mess of intentionally loving them.  Love takes risk.  Love takes forgiveness and grace.  Love takes effort, time, and commitment (all things we are scared of it would seem).  You commit not to bolt when it gets hard, because it will get hard.  All of this is the cost of deep relationship, we just don't have capacity and space to go deep with everyone.  So we have to become INTENTIONAL."

She reminds us we are in a RACE, and that we need to run with purpose, eyes on the finish line, pushing through the pain for the glory we know awaits us when we stand before Jesus and receive the ultimate prize - the crown of life.

Running is important.  We can't finish the race unless we run.
BUT, we must also keep in mind that HOW we run matters too.

I couldn't help but think of the story of the Tortoise and the Hare.  Ironically enough, we were highlighting the letter T in our homeschool curriculum last week and learned about turtles in the process.  We read numerous versions of Aesop's famous fable.

As you recall, the tortoise wins the race.
Why? Because the hare didn't run with intention.  He didn't take things seriously.  He dilly dallied.  He took his sweet time.  He rested.  He got distracted.  He loitered.  He PIDDLED.

Let us learn from this humbled hare.
Let us also take note of Joseph in the Bible.  He could have chosen to give up when he was sold into slavery by his own brothers.  He could have despaired when we was wrongly accused and thrown into prison by Potiphar.  He could have crawled up in the corner and had a pity party.  But he didn't.  Instead, he made the most of the time he was given, even in the hardest and worst of times.  Especially in those times.

Allen commends Joseph, "He could not control his circumstances, but he intentionally leveraged EVERY relationship in his path for the glory of God.  He NEVER wasted opportunity to serve, even those who wronged him."

PIDDLE was not in Joseph's vocabulary.
Nor should it be in ours today.

Allen reminds us of our need for people and people's need for us.  However, it's not random or haphazard.  "We just don't need people; we need the RIGHT people.  Sometimes finding the right people takes discipline and effort.  And then when we find them, we have to FIGHT for them. We have to PRIORITIZE time and issue grace OVER AND OVER, because even the best human on this earth will disappoint us.  And when that happens, you love and fight for that person even HARDER."

Surely you are familiar with the popular TV series Friends.  The show was such a success, I believe, because we wanted what Phoebe, Monica, Joey, Chandler, Ross, and Rachel had - a rare closeness among friends, depth, meaning, love, loyalty.

Relationships, friendships, like that don't just happen on accident.
They don't have to be "as seen on TV" only though.  They can be a reality in our lives today.
However, as Allen writes, "Close friends and mentors don't fall in our laps.  You search and invest, and then you allow them to be imperfect versions of what you were hoping for in your head.  Most of us are waiting to be invited, waiting to be pursued, waiting for friends to come to us.  But that's NOT the way it happens..."

So, STOP waiting.
Stop loitering.
Stop PIDDLING.

Allen urges us, "Love is an active process, and we are fairly lazy.  So INITIATE.  Then, when you come together, initiate DEPTH.  Great conversations come from great questions and honest answers...It takes INITIATIVE to ask deeper questions and sheer BRAVERY to give sincere answers.  Pray and find ways to take your friendships to a deeper level."

This paragraph reminded me of my college days.  My junior year was by far the best year because of the CLOSE friendships I formed, friendships that are still strong today nearly 11 years later!  What made these friendships different, strong, able to stand the test of time?  We went DEEP with each other.  When we sat down to eat lunch or supper, we asked the harder questions.  We even made a point of NOT having "shallow talk" with anyone.  Rather than asking someone, "So, what's your major?" we would dig a bit more, "What do you want to do with your major?  What's your goal after Moody?  What's your dream?"  And that was usually within the first 5 minutes of meeting someone!  Often times, people were taken off guard, not expecting us to delve into their life purpose so soon.  I tell you what, though, we knew each other well.  We CARED for each other deeply.  We prayed with each other on a regular basis.  We pushed each other.  We challenged each other.  We encouraged and supported each other.  And when we went our separate ways upon graduation, thanks to Facebook and modern technology, we have stayed in touch and still do all those things for each other despite the thousands of miles that separate us (we are now on 5 different continents)!

Was that easy to do?
No.  It was messy.  Painful at times.
But, oh so worth it!!!!
I look back as that year as one of the BEST times of my entire life thus far.  I grew so much that year.  Indeed, that year was foundational to helping me become the woman I am today.  I am better wife, mother, friend, daughter, childbirth instructor, doula, health coach, and follower of Jesus because of that one year in college.

I can't keep looking back though.  Memories are all well and good, but they don't truly get me anywhere.  I am running a race and must focus on where I am at NOW, as well as fix my eyes on what is yet to come, what God has for me in the days, weeks, and years ahead.

I must remember God has put me where I am now, with the people I am with now, for a reason.  And I must be INTENTIONAL with the time I have been given, with the people God has placed around me.

And so must YOU.
Allen reassures us, "I know your life may feel more random and disconnected" than someone else's, "but you can't tell me God would plan the details of Joseph's live and ignore yours."

She then issues us a challenge, "Next time you are in a public place, be awkward and look in people's eyes.  People - NEARLY EVERY ONE OF THEM - are hurting, even if they don't say it.  And we hold their cure.  WE GET TO GIVE GOD AWAY, and it is for our JOY.  I am never more content that when I am meeting needs."

Are you up for this challenge?
Or does it scare the bajibbies out of you?

Do you want to play it safe?
Or are you willing to lay it on the line, to step out and be different, to be intentional with your time, to put a stop to piddling?

We have to make a choice:
"At some point we have to decide whether or not it is worth it to spend our lives helping people be free from bondage, meeting their needs, cheering for them as they run, giving them God.  And at some point, if I find myself being completely mocked and rejected and hurt, IS IT STILL WORTH IT FOR ME?"

I never said this would be easy.
Jesus never promised that either.
BUT, His way is certainly the best, the most fulfilling, the most rewarding.  In deed, it is the ONLY way to truly LIVE.

As Allen describes, "God's economy makes beautiful exchanges; as we give, we grow."

And so I am stepping up to accept her challenge, "Seek risks and uncomfortable things.  You do not risk like a fool; you are WISELY INVESTING in the only two things that will not die: God and people's souls."

This means no loitering allowed.
No dilly dallying.
No getting distracted.
No putting off until tomorrow what can be done today.
No making excuses.
NO PIDDLING.

Because if we piddle, we miss it all!!!!

Satan wants nothing more than for us to check out of the race.  He longs for us to be the hare - to settle down on the sidelines, thinking we have all the time in the world, that taking a little rest won't hurt anything or anyone, that we'll be fine and still come out on top in the end.  How wrong we would be to listen to his deathly lies!!!!

Like Joseph, we must not waste time trying to control our circumstances.  As he did, as he CHOSE to do, we must invest our time STRATEGICALLY and unconditionally love and serve people.  It will be the best investment of our lives!

Earlier this week, I invited you to be a zebra with me, and today I am urging you to follow the example of the steady tortoise.  He may have been slow, but never did he stop "running" the race.  Never once did he piddle.

Nor should we!