Life Among Death

Yesterday, at our church, we celebrated with those who have committed to living all out for Jesus.  They have trusted Him as their Savior and are dedicated to passionately pursuing Him with all their hearts, souls, minds, and strength.  To "outsiders" baptism can appear quite the strange initiation into Christianity (though I will take it over circumcision any day!).  I mean really, giving the pastor permission to dunk them under the water is weird enough, but if taking this plunge most likely means people will think you are odd, make fun of you, and maybe even physically persecute you.  You see, these Jesus followers are not just getting a stamp on their "Get Out of Hell" card.  They aren't just passing Go and collecting $200.  Oh no!  This is a hard-core, radical lifestyle that will result in strange looks, loss of friends and possibly family, and guaranteed difficulties here on earth.  Why in the world, then, would anyone in their right mind willingly make this type of decision?!

Our pastor had a very nice 7 point sermon to answer your question, and I welcome you to listen to it.  Very unlike Michael, all 7 of his points even rhyme!

I have been reflecting on life quite a bit since the baptism service yesterday.  Most of my pondering has been done with tears running down my cheeks.  Yesterday afternoon, I learned that our dear friends the Ewings had said good-bye to their precious son Levi, who has been battling brain tumors and cancer for some time now.  Not an hour later, I was driving to the store to get some pizzas for our Ponca Info Night, and my mom calls, crying, to let me know that her brother Donald had passed away, also losing a battle against cancer.  Then, this morning, I get on facebook and one of the first posts I see is about another friend's dad going home to be with Jesus, again having fought cancer and lost.  Just about 30 minutes ago, I realized I had missed a call from my mom.  When I listened to the voicemail, she informed me that my Uncle Tomp is not doing well at all and expected to pass away any day now.

So much death!

How am I supposed to go on with my life in the midst of so much death?

Well, honestly, I can't.  At least not in the same way as I have lived before these dear ones have left this earth.  If I am to learn anything from all this loss, then I must take inventory of my own life, making sure that my priorities are right, that I am investing in the right things, that I am spending my time and energies on what really matters.

This morning I read in Psalm 39, and was once again made aware how God has me exactly where He wants me in His Word at the exact right time.  "Lord, remind me how brief my time on earth will be.  Remind me that my days are numbered, and that my life is fleeing away.  My life is no longer than the width of my hand.  An entire lifetime is just a moment to You; human existence is but a breath."

Then, I thought of Psalm 139, "You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb.  Thank You for making me so wonderfully complex!  Your workmanship is marvelous -- and how well I know it.  You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.  You saw me before I was born.  every day of my life was recorded in Your book.  Every moment was laid out before a single day passed!"

As I typed these verses, my hand immediately rubbed my belly, which is already showing that new life is growing within me.  My tiny baby is only the size of prune, but he/she has arms with elbows that can bend, tooth buds are forming under the gums, and a stomach producing digestive juices.  How crazy, and utterly divine, is that!  I haven't even met this baby yet, but I love him/her with all my heart.  I want what is best for him/her and am praying for his/her future spouse!  I can only imagine how precious this little one is to God, his/her Creator and Designer!  I have no idea what this baby will be like, but God knows every single thing about him/her, including the number of days he/she will have on this earth, and what will happen on every single one of those days.

God wasn't taken aback yesterday when Levi's body lost the battle against cancer.  He wasn't surprised when my Uncle Donald also passed away.  Nor was He shocked today when Cliff Johnson was at heaven's gate.  He knew all this would take place.  And He was ready with out-stretched arms to welcome His children home.

But what about those of us left here on earth, our empty arms aching and our hearts hurting from loss?  How do we keep on living in the midst of death?

God had me read Paul's words in Philippians this morning, as well.  "But we are citizens of heaven, where the Lord Jesus Christ (and now Levi and Cliff and so many other loved ones) lives.  And we are eagerly waiting for Him to return as our Savior."

I am still working on figuring out what "eagerly waiting for Jesus" looks like in my daily life.  But , I know today it meant reading books and playing outside with the kiddos, making muffins with Coralyn, and praying for loved ones.  Tonight, it will mean kissing Lawrence when he gets home from school, giving the girls a bath and reading them a  Bible story, tucking them in and kissing their heads one more time.  I know it will mean that I don't worry as much about having a lot of stuff here on earth, but rather using my resources to bless and encourage others.  It will mean looking for opportunities to give, to share God's love, to invite others to enjoy a personal relationship with Jesus like I do.  And if in the process it means getting weird looks, people thinking I am strange, losing all my material possessions, or even dying a martyr, then so be it!

I just got done wildly cheering for 21 people who committed to live this way yesterday morning as they were baptized.  Should I then not be right there beside them, living just as boldly and radically?