At night before I go to bed, I wonder, "Could today have been my last day as a mommy of just one precious child?"
This weekend could have been the last time I go to church pregnant (this time around at least).
Was this morning's storytime at the library the last time I will go and hear the question, "So when are you due?"
When Lawrence leaves for work, I wonder if I will be calling him later in the day, telling him to come home because it's baby time.
Was my prenatal appointment yesterday the last one I will have with this pregnancy?
All this anticipation. All this waiting and wondering. All this eagerness and excitement. And well there should be! A new baby is definitely worth all the fuss :)
As each day passes, I think more and more, "Will today be the day? Will I get to meet my baby today? Will I get to hold her and kiss her? Will I find out what she looks like? Will I get to count those fingers and toes that have been jabbing me for the past months? Will today be the day?" God gently reminded me that I should be this excited, this eager to meet Jesus. Every morning when I wake up, my first thought should be, "Is today the day I will see Jesus face to face? Is today the day I will meet my Lord and Savior? Is today the day?"
I have done as much as possible to prepare for my baby's arrival. I have been busy, busy, busy getting ready for her. Is the same true of me getting ready for Jesus' return? Am I as dedicated and committed and anxious to be ready for the day I meet Him?
Sadly, the honest answer has to be NO. I get so caught up in the responsibilities and tasks of this life that I forget about the one that is to come, the one that really matters. I lose focus. I get distracted.
Christmas is the perfect time to be refocus though. As we countdown the days to Christmas, we can remember that we are preparing to celebrate Christ's birth. While we read familiar stories about Mary and Joseph and their trip to Bethlehem and the glorious night of Jesus' arrival, our hearts overflow with joy and gratitude for God's amazing gift, His one and only Son. We marvel at the thought of God becoming man and living among us. How thankful I am for His sacrifice in giving up the majesties of heaven and exchanging them for the pitfalls of this world. This year, though, as I anticipate meeting my own precious child, I am above all blown away that Jesus too was a tiny baby, completely helpless and dependent on Mary. I can only imagine what Mary was thinking as she held Jesus for the first time, knowing that the Son of God was in her arms, that she was responsible for Him. WOW!
But as I try to get my mind around the idea of Jesus being a newborn, I am also more than ever impressed with the fact that I must be prepared for His return. That sweet little baby grew up and gave His life for me on the cross. One day He will come back, and I want to be ready! Just as I wonder if today will be the day that I meet my precious baby, I should be so eager to see my Jesus face to face.
And so I go about the rest of my tasks for the day, I will be asking myself the same question over and over again about two very different things. Could TODAY be the day?
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