Special Bond

Yesterday, I was "lucky" enough to attend the birth of my dear friend's son. She asked me to be her doula, and I couldn't have been more excited. I was so blessed to be able to share this experience with her and help her and her husband welcome their son to the world.

We have joked around that their son could possibly be Kellah's future husband, forever uniting our families! It would be pretty funny if that happened and Kellah could tell Eli she was there when he was born. And that, I -- his mother-in-law -- had been there too!

Eli at birth is already bigger than Kellah at 10 weeks! :)

All joking aside, I am thrilled to have been at Eli's birth yesterday. I am completely and definitely hooked on helping people prepare to welcome their babies to the world by teaching childbirth classes and now I am all the more eager to have opportunities to serve as a doula and be physically present when the babies do make their grand entrance.

Throughout Jessi's labor I was analyzing what was happening through the lens of all that I have learned as an childbirth instructor. I knew the signs that she was in transition and then the beginnings of the second stage (pushing). BUT, I was also responding to everything as a woman who had just given birth not that long ago. I recognized those low, deep moans and figured we would be meeting Jessi's baby sooner rather than later. As I moaned with Jessi, I was doing my best to relive what I had felt at the same point during Kellah's birth. In doing so, I was also hoping that her labor would go as quickly and smoothly as mine had. And although she did have a longer second stage than I did, her overall labor was shorter than mine was with Kellah's! That's pretty good too, since I was only in labor with Kellah for 6 hours from my first contraction until the second she was born. Jessi beat me with her "mere" 2 to 3 hours of labor!

I was also there for Jessi as a friend. In fact, I hope that was the first hat I wore. Yes, I was her childbirth class instructor. Yes, she hired me as her doula. But, in my mind, first and foremost I was there as Jessi's friend. I was there to help her in any way she needed so that this birth experience would be the best possible and one she could look back on with fond memories and pride. I kind of felt an extra responsibility to make that happen as I was the one who introduced the idea of natural childbirth to them and planted the thought of having a home birth in their heads. If I was going to play a role in transforming them into some strange, wacked-out people who have babies in their living rooms and bedrooms, then I at least wanted them to be successful at it! Hence, I didn't think it awkward or weird to moan right along with her, to fix her ponytail when it fell out, to massage her shoulders, to hold her placenta in a plastic tub and then take pictures of it while the midwife looked it over and showed it to Jessi. I am humbled that Jessi would invite me to be a part of something so special and personal.

I love all of my friends' kiddos, but I think I have a special bond with Mr. Eli. In the same way that I want to see my former 5th grade students excel academically and even more importantly spiritually, I am excited to see Eli grow up. And as he does, I will celebrate every milestone from rolling over to sitting up to crawling to walking to attending his first day of school to graduating from college. But even more deeply, I look forward to hearing that he has decided to follow Jesus and then to watch him live wholeheartedly for God. I want this for all of my friends' kids, but there's something special with Eli.

As I think about this connection that I have with this brand new baby boy, I am realizing that this sense of closeness is good. Our small group is my closest set of friends right now. Jay and Jessi are a part of this group. Over the past several years of having these people into our home on a weekly basis for Bible study and prayer, we have developed "deep" relationships with them. Our friendships go beyond the hour we spend together on Wednesday nights, although that is foundational. Really, we "do life" together and encourage each other to "do life" better. We babysit each other's kids so we can go on dates. We share meals. We watch the Super Bowl together. We exchange white elephant gifts at Christmas parties. But most importantly, we challenge each other to be in the Word and to live it out, boldly. We pray for each other. We hold each other accountable to put into action what God has been teaching us. We support each other when times are hard. And while we don't typically attend each other's baby's births, I think it's good to be invested in each other's families to the point that we deeply care about the spiritual formation and development of each other's kids.

Lately, I have been reading books about being totally in love with God to the point that we live radically for Him, about our need to be completely dependent on the Holy Spirit, and about the way we "do" church. I think these books have stirred up my heart's desire to be a part of a community of believers who join together on this wild journey of being God's child, challenging and inspiring and encouraging each other along the way to be bold in our faith and hold nothing back as we proclaim our love for Jesus. After helping Jay and Jessi welcome their baby to the world yesterday, I realize that I am part of a community like this. I am so thankful for the people in our small group and the opportunity to run beside them as we pursue Christ and race towards the ultimate prize of knowing Him fully.

Not only that, I am extremely glad my girls get to grow up in this environment, surrounded by people who are madly in love with Jesus and living all out for Him. My deepest and greatest desire is for them to each accept Jesus as Lord and Savior at a young age and then proceed to pour their hearts out to Him at every stage of life. I am already praying for the friends they will make in the elementary years and then high school and college, wanting them to choose people who will help them become more like Jesus. Even more fervently, I am praying for the men they will eventually marry. I want them to walk down the aisle to a man who is deeply in love with God so that as they follow his lead, they will be following Christ Himself.

And who knows, maybe one of my girls will marry Mr. Eli! :) Whatever the case may be, I feel like I have a special bond with this little boy, a bond that has inspired and challenged me to go deeper in my relationships with fellow believers such that we "push" each other to become all that God has created us to be.