She had to wear these things on her ears that made her look like an elf. The room had to be completely quiet, Coralyn had to be totally still, and the machine had to work...all at the same time! I think we were there for over two hours! Coralyn passed the "test," as I knew she would since she was responding just fine to us at home.
I had this memory in the back of my head and was dreading repeating it with Kellah. Only this time I would add an active toddler to the mix. So, I put the test off for as long as I could. I would have skipped it all together, but I got a letter in the mail from the State of Missouri saying I was a delinquent parent since my child had not had her hearing tested. Not wanting to be viewed as a terrible mother, I called that day and set up the appointment. The earliest one available was a month later. Fine with me.
The day finally came though, and I couldn't put the hearing test off any longer. Of course they had to schedule it at 2 pm, right in the middle of nap time....meaning neither one of the girls got a nap! When we arrived and I checked us in, Kellah was sleeping away in her carseat. Fifteen minutes later when they called us to the registration desk, she was screaming at the top of her lungs. And of course, they had entered the information in wrong, so I had to give them all the basics over again: name, address, phone number, date of birth...for me, Lawrence, and Kellah!
After they got all that squared away, we were sent back to the chairs to wait some more. Kellah falls back asleep. Coralyn is busy crawling all over the chairs and watching cartoons on the TV across the room and playing with the toys in the waiting area. Thankfully, we didn't have to wait long before our name was called and we were lead back to the hearing test booth.
I was relieved to see that it was somewhat a soundproof room so that there wouldn't need to be absolute silence outside the room during the test. However, Coralyn would be in the room with me, and need to be both still and quiet. Right! :) Did I mention the room was just big enough for a chair for me to sit in while I held Kellah and the computer equipment needed to do the testing. That left about 2 square feet for Coralyn! The "doctor" was nice enough to bring Coralyn some coloring pages (about 15 of them!) and a box of crayons (a super size box with 48 crayons!). In about three seconds, Coralyn had dumped the entire box of crayons on the floor and finished coloring all the pages :) She's not much for detail when she colors yet. And so I gave her the 4 library books I had brought with me. She finished reading those in another 37 seconds. The "doctor" hadn't even finished putting the wires on Kellah yet.
Ah yes, the wires. This is where it gets really good! She had to put a tab on Kellah's forehead which was connected to a long wire that ran all the way to the computer. Then, she had to put an earbud thingy in each of Kellah's ears, plus these things that looked like clip-on earrings, and attachment clips on both of her shoulders. Every time she shifted, a wire would move or an earbud would come out. So the "doctor" had to reinsert the earbud, adjust the wires, and so on.
And Kellah's supposed to be asleep during all of this? Yeah right! How would YOU like it if someone was jamming and rejamming and rejamming something into your ear? I'm sure you would just peacefully snooze away. Um, NO!
To try to calm Kellah down, I tried to nurse her. But with all the wires and what not, there was no way I could cover her up. So hopefully the "doctor" lady wasn't too embarrassed by my breastfeeding in public. Kellah didn't seem to enjoy eating with all those wires attached to her anyway, or the fact that every time the earbud fell out the "doctor" put it back in. So I gave up trying to nurse her to sleep and switched to the "hold her facing outward and rock back and forth" method. After about 10 or so minutes, she was calm once again. And so we tried to start the test once again. Did I mention she had to be asleep for that?
And don't forget about Coralyn and her crayons and bazillion coloring sheets which were strewn about the floor.
Finally, I was able to get Kellah to nurse and fall asleep. The test could officially begin. Coralyn actually did a pretty good job during the test. She pretended to sleep on the floor, which involved making snoring noises and rolling back and forth as much as humanly possible. At least she wasn't screaming or pulling on the cords. She did attempt to take some stickers off the wall and then started peeling the paper off the crayons. After several nasty looks, as that was all I could do seeing as how I was holding a wire-wrapped Kellah and couldn't move lest the earbud fall out again and couldn't make any noise lest I wake up the sleeping baby, meaning the test would have to be stopped. And we certainly didn't want that!
After what seemed like an eternity, the test was finished and Kellah passed. I could have told you that...without all the hassle of the wires and earbuds! But, my saying that she turns her head when I talk to her or startles when she hears a sudden, loud noise wouldn't have been quite scientific enough. And so we went through all the medical necessities.
I was ready to pack up and be done, never to come back again (until our next child has his/her hearing tested). However, the test indicated that Kellah had some fluid in her left ear. They wanted to do more testing right then to find out more about this situation. That required Kellah being awake, sitting still on my lap, and being quiet...while they put a earbud thing in her ear and wiggled it around! Yeah, like she's going to be quiet and not fuss at all while they do that! Needless to say, we have to go back when she is 6 months old for another hearing test to check on that fluid. I am so looking forward to that! NOT!
Seriously, there's got to be a better way!
Maybe I can work on that...invent a new, hassle free way of testing a baby's hearing. Or, if any of you moms (or dads) have any tips for next time, let me know.
Because there really does have to be a better way! And let's hope it's been invented before the next Youngin' arrives! :)
my sister had to do that with Hollis b/c he failed the test in the hospital. But I guess since you don't have hospital births that is why you have to go in?! (don't want that to sound bad, just sayin'...) B/c we do ours in KS right after they are born in the hospital and it takes like 5 secs each ear...I have no helpful suggestions that has to be rough. I hate taking both kids to the doc and trying to focus on their questions. She probably just has a basic ear infection...I would see if your PCP can just dx that and be done with it, I mean she passed right?! And their should be an opt out option. My goodness if people can opt of of vaccinations then you should definitely be able to opt out of this...there is my two cents. :)
ReplyDeleteSarah--yes I had to do this with Hollis b/c he failed his hearing test 3 times in the hospital. I got letters in the mail too! I finally called by letter 3 to set up the dreaded test. It was a good thing I called b/c he had only one month to go before they would sedate him b/c of his "age" and needing him to be asleep. Oh I know the nightmare. Praise God Kreg took off of work to go b/c I had no idea how I was going to do it with Landrey. Actually I think they said she could not come in at all and I was like well I have no babysitter and of course they could care less. O yes. The state of Illinois said in my letter that it was considered child abuse if I did not respond to the letter...really??? Anyhow, he passed. Whew! Glad that is over for now:)
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